Tag Archives: Ginger Burrell

My First Anxiety Dream about Art

I love dreams. I’ve been blessed with amazingly creative dreams for as long as I can remember. One of my favorites was when I was swimming the backstroke down Santa Teresa Boulevard — only there was no water.

Most of my dreams are interesting and thought provoking, but sometimes I wake up stressed instead of rested. I have reoccurring anxiety dreams, you probably do, too.

Until last night my anxiety dreams were one of two variations:

Variation 1: I go to the university to take a final and either I haven’t studied or I go to the wrong lecture hall or I go too late and the final is over.

Variation 2: I am back at the preschool that I ran for 10 years and I’m working through some personal trauma with one of the teachers or there are no teachers and I’m trying to take care of all the kids by myself or there is some threat to the school and/or children that is out of my control.

Last night, for the first time, I had an artist anxiety dream. I’m not sure if this is good (maybe only “real” artists have anxiety dreams – the “real” being a discussion for a whole other blog) or bad (now I have three variations, darn!)

The dream went something like this: I have been invited to have a solo show at a gallery. I’m thrilled, of course, and I work very hard on the books, the display, and the installation. I get it all done and installed and it’s opening night. All of a sudden, before anyone can see my work, the building sprinklers go off and, as I watch in horror, my artists’ books become a ruined, soggy, mess.

Hmm.

I know where the solo show idea came from. I’ve spent the last several days applying to gallery shows. But I have no idea why I didn’t try to move, cover or otherwise protect the books.

Do you have art anxiety dreams? Feel free to post them in the comments!

~Ginger

www.gingerburrell.com

I’m Telling You Now – An Artists’ Book about Violence against Women

As one of the 1 in 4 women who will experience sexual violence in their lifetimes, I am a survivor of rape. I tell my story because it is not a secret. I did nothing wrong and if I tell you then we share the responsibility and the weight of it. I don’t have to shoulder it by myself any longer.

When I decided to explore the topic of violence against women for my BFA show, I didn’t know what to expect. It is not a pleasant topic. It is stressful for me to talk about, to make art about, even to write this blog about. But it is important. Period.

I’m Telling You Now emphasizes the power of secrets and the way that we keep them because of the shame and the fear that we were somehow responsible.

I admit, there are tears running down my face, but they are not for what happened to me, instead they are for the experience I had when sharing this book.  What happened during my BFA show opening was beyond anything I could have imagined. Women came up to me and told me their stories, right there, in the gallery. Women called me days later and told me their stories. They said things like, “I’ve never told anyone, but I know you will understand.”  And what I realized in those moments was that by telling each other our stories we were taking away the power of the people who hurt us. Secrets are so powerful and they continue to hurt the people who keep them. More than one woman has since said, “I want you to tell my story.” In the future I hope to make artists’ books together with other women to tell their stories – perhaps in a gallery project. 

I’m Telling You Now has had several iterations. This is the final version, I’m ready to release it out into the world. It is an edition of 10.

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~Ginger

www.gingerburrell.com

Loves Me/Not – An Artists’ Book About Love and Loss

Part of the BFA series, “Always Reborn,” this structure is one of my favorites. The accordion book has fold up leaves to create pockets and features the reoccurring motif of a daisy – who hasn’t plucked those petals at least once? Designing the structure was a labor of love and precision – for some reason it felt important that the daisy be in the front and back of the pockets so that when you pull out a story, the daisies are still complete.

We’ve all felt them, the rollercoaster ups of being in love and the screaming downhills of being hurt. Loves Me/Not is a collection of 12 real stories gathered from women of all ages about times that they felt loved and times that they felt hurt, betrayed, and left behind.

The stories are tender, poignant and funny. Here is just one of the stories included in Loves Me/Not:

My ex-boyfriend and I decided to call it quits. I wanted to make things work, he was my first love and  I thought we were meant to be together. I still remember calling him that Sunday to talk about our relationship and hearing him
say, “I’m sorry,  I love you, but it’s just too hard.”  I remember feeling my throat go dry, I was completely speechless. I actually felt like my heart had  stopped beating. The days following our breakup I couldn’t eat and I cried myself to sleep at night. This was my first experience with heartbreak.

Loves Me/Not is archival inkjet printed on Rives BFK and is an edition of 10.

~Ginger

www.gingerburrell.com